“Oh sorry, did I say that too loud?” I say as we tip toe through the house.
It’s been a long day of planning and here I go almost messing it all up. We are at Jill’s house and Mike is sleeping. We’ve been drinking most of the night. I carry the tire iron from Jill’s trunk. She just grabbed a pillow from the couch. We giggle while we try to hold it, which just makes it worse. Jill just found out that that Mike was cheating. He was soundly sleeping, blissfully unaware that she knows. We came up with a plan tonight to get revenge. We some how manage to open the bedroom door without waking Mike. We quietly giggle our way to the bed, he’s still sleeping. How can some one sleep through this? We are not being as quiet as we think. Jill is at the head of the bed, pillow hovering over Mike’s face. I’m at the foot of the bed doubled over, holding in my laugh, trying not to pee myself. Jill changes her mind and drops the pillow to the floor. She grabs the tire iron from me and whacks Mike in the head. His body slightly bounces, but he doesn’t wake, he’s still breathing. I’m not laughing anymore, I though we were just going to scare him.
Jill tells me to, “Grab his feet and pull him off the bed”
I’m too shocked to move, but she’s yelling at me now. One foot is in my hand, Jill has the other one. We are dragging Mike’s body through the house. His head jumps up every time we cross a threshold. This night is turning into something completely different.
We get Mike’s body to the front porch. We drop his feet. I stand there sweating and Jill is back in the house. She comes out with the belt from her bathrobe and a pair of handcuffs.
She cuts the bathrobe belt in half, “Tie his feet to the railing.”
She handcuffs one are to the railing while I’m tying his feet. Jill is gone again. This time she comes out with the dogs leash and a permanent marker. She ties his free arm to the railing. Cuts off his clothes. With the permanent marker in big black letters she writes CHEATER. There we leave Mike to wake up when the tire iron hang over wears off.
